Childless Cat Ladies: JD Vance Hit a Raw Nerve

Sen. JD Vance (R-Ohio) commented to Tucker Carlson in 2021 that he thought Democrats were promoting an “antifamily” agenda led by “a bunch of childless cat ladies who are miserable at their own lives and the choices that they’ve made and so they want to make the rest of the country miserable, too.” He recently said the comment was “sarcasm” and a “joke”. But his regret seems disingenuous because he further elaborated, “How does it make any sense that we’ve turned our country over to people who don’t really have a direct stake in it?” And he advocated in recent years that adults without children should pay higher taxes and have fewer voting rights. Taken in whole, he has offended quite a few women. 

If he meant to convey “sarcasm” and a “joke,”  it fell flat. His comments are not funny to involuntarily childless people. It’s hurtful. Vance’s comments rub salt in the wounds of these people. The cat lady term is an insult to the growing number of women who don’t have kids, whether by choice or not.

So, let’s take a closer look at childless cat ladies. Are they anti-family? Are they miserable? Are they unhappy with their choices? Do they have an agenda to make the rest of the country miserable? Do childless people have a stake in our country? 

Are childless people anti-family? No. A family is a group of two or more people related by birth, marriage, or adoption who live together. The concept of family has evolved, and there is no longer one dominant family type. Vance refers to a mother and one father with biological or adopted children. However, other families may include blended families, single-parent families, cohabitating couples, and same-sex couples with or without children, adoptive families, grandparents raising grandchildren, families with foster children, and children caring for aging parents. These are all families. Childless people can participate in the ‘world of children’, especially if they have good friends or relatives who have children. 

Anti-family means opposing or being unsupportive of families or family values. Pro-family policies might include childcare tax credits, family leave, long-term care, school finance, and welfare reform. It would be anti-family to oppose these policies. Everyone benefits from pro-family policies, even those without children. 

Are childless people miserable? No. According to a happiness expert, unmarried and childless women are the happiest subgroup of the population. Fifty-seven percent of people under fifty who say they’re unlikely to become parents do not want to have children, the Pew Research Center reports. Another 44 percent say they would rather explore their careers or interests, and just over a third say they can’t afford to raise a child. Nearly one in five American women end their childbearing years without having borne a child, compared with one in ten in the 1970s. Women now enjoy privileges that have historically been afforded only to men.

Are childless people unhappy with their choices? No. A Reddit user posed a “serious” question about being childless to the Ask Reddit subforum and received a lot of honest answers. They asked, “People over 50 that chose to be childfree, do you regret your decision? Why or why not?” The people who responded are overwhelmingly happy with their decision not to have children.

A surprising number said they felt positive about their decision because they thought they’d be a lousy parent. Others said they were happy to have been able to enjoy more free time than their friends and family members who had kids.

Some people regret being childless when they get older. An Australian researcher found that a quarter of child-free women came to regret the decision once they were past child-bearing age and began contemplating old age alone. However, being childless is not the only reason people are lonely in old age. I read one statistic that most visits to nursing homes last between 30 and 40 minutes, but some are as short as 15 minutes. Is that a fair trade for having children? Maybe not. 

Do childless people have an agenda to make the rest of the country miserable? No. You could argue that childless people contribute to society at large. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, volunteers without children under eighteen are more likely to volunteer for most types of organizations than are parents. And, getting involved in charitable projects can help people feel a sense of purpose and worthiness.

Here are some interesting statistics. Childless women who are college-educated, live in cities, and have a good financial standing tend to have a higher quality of life and better-perceived health. Unmarried and childless women are more likely to live longer than their married and child-rearing peers. Childless women tend to have a higher median personal net worth than childless men. Women who are involuntarily childless tend to adapt well to their circumstances, which can promote well-being. Women who don’t have children are more likely to say that being successful in their career has been easier than men who don’t have children. Childfree couples can experience financial stability. Childfree couples can have a reduced impact on the environment.

Do childless people have a stake in our country? Yes. “Having a stake in this country” means having a personal interest or involvement in the country or feeling that one’s actions can contribute to its success. For example, one might say that everyone has a stake in making sure the legal system is fair. Voting is a fundamental principle, and all Americans deserve equal opportunity to make their voices heard in our democracy. JD Vance disagrees. He proposed that people with children be given more voting power than people without kids. As a leader, he fails to support a basic democratic principle that every person is considered equal and is empowered to participate equally in their government. 

Let me say it again. Every person is equal, whether they have children or not, regardless of the demographic of their families.