Is Your Christmas Spending Out of Control?

“Out of control” Christmas shopping often refers to spending that exceeds a planned budget or results in debt.

I’ve read that average holiday spending in the US is higher than you might expect. If you include holiday gifts, food, decorations, and other seasonal items, consumers are expected to spend an average of around $890 to $1,014 per person. Of that total, the average amount planned for gifts for family, friends, and coworkers is typically around $628. If your household earns $100,000 or more, your gift spending might be closer to $1,500. Parents plan to spend, on average, more than $160 on holiday gifts for each child. More than half of Americans (57%) have indicated they would willingly take on debt (or more debt) to make someone they love happy during the holiday season. And nearly half of people (47%) surveyed in one study admitted to regretting how much they spent on Christmas. Yikes.

I saw a Facebook post saying that pathological consumption has become so normalized that we scarcely notice it. The post recommends that instead of showing our love through purchases, we bake them a cake, write them a poem, give them a kiss, tell them a joke, but for god’s sake stop trashing the planet assuming that consumerism contributes to waste to tell someone you care. All it shows is that you don’t. Attributed to George Monbiot, (1.14.2018)

So, Christmas shopping is expensive and could be pathological. True? Maybe. Research estimates that 5.8% of the US population struggles with compulsive shopping. (Koran et al., 2006).

(The following information is shared from https://therapist.com/behaviors/compulsive-shopping.)

Compulsive shopping, not exclusively related to holidays, is characterized by excessive shopping that often leads to financial problems. People who shop compulsively tend to feel intense urges to shop, and they may go on spending sprees where they buy a lot in a short period of time.

What does compulsive shopping look like? Some people call themselves shopping addicts or “shopaholics” in a playful way. But for those who shop compulsively, it’s an uncontrollable obsession.

There are four phases of compulsive shopping. Anticipation: You become fixated on an item or items you want to buy. You may spend a lot of time thinking about the item, thinking about shopping for it, and talking about it with others. Preparation: You start to feel excited and happy about the prospect of buying the item. You may make plans to research the item, go shopping, save money, or borrow money to make the purchase. Shopping: You go shopping for the item. This is often accompanied by feelings of excitement and euphoria. Spending: You buy the item and feel a rush of pleasure or relief. This is often followed by feelings of guilt, shame, and emptiness.

Is compulsive shopping a mental disorder? It was, but is not currently, in the “Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders” (DSM-5). It is not officially defined as a disorder today. But compulsive shopping is likely fueled by emotional needs. For some people, compulsive shopping may be a way to cope with negative emotions or underlying mental health conditions such as anxiety or depression.

It can be tricky to distinguish compulsive shopping from standard-issue retail therapy. Here are some key signs to look for:

• You shop primarily to feel happy or to relieve stress. You frequently shop when you’re feeling down, anxious, or bored.
• You spend a lot of time thinking about shopping, planning to shop, and actually shopping.
• You often buy things you don’t need or can’t afford.
• After buying something, you feel regretful, guilty, or ashamed.
• Your home or closet is full of unopened or unused items from previous shopping sprees.
• You try to keep your shopping habits secret from others.
• Your financial situation is suffering because of your shopping.

Christmas can trigger compulsive spending due to psychological factors like emotional stress, a desire for social acceptance, and the “warm glow” of giving, which can lead to financial strain and distress.

How should you manage compulsive spending? Set a budget. Create a realistic spending plan and set limits before shopping. Avoid triggers. Stay away from tempting stores, sales, and online retail sites. Start early. Beginning your shopping earlier can help spread out the costs and reduce the stress of last-minute purchases. Focus on non-material gifts. Consider giving practical gifts, experiences, or handmade items.